Having finished the vacuuming, dishes and tidying, I found myself sitting in a spotless house – with my one-month-old bachelors degree certificate mocking me on the wall – watching The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Have. You. Seen. This!
It’s not even a guilty pleasure for me. I marvel at the fact that these people – also rattling around spotless houses mansions – actually exist. It’s like a social study! This is too easy to mock, so I won’t go too mad.
My favourite parts are when they cry. Not because I’m heartless, but because their faces don’t move. They don’t! They are botoxed and nipped and tucked to the point of having frozen features. I actually came across this montage of them trying to cry to illustrate my point:

They remind me of Cassandra: A Doctor Who villain who was nothing but face and skin stretched on a frame after 708 plastic surgery operations.
Secondly, I’m constantly frustrated when they try to say words that begin with the letter ‘w’. Because their lips can’t touch. They’re too taut.
I sometimes wonder what would happen if I rocked up to Beverly Hills in my un-lifted face, and un-branded conservative clothes. Would I get double takes? Or strapped down to a surgical bed to be turned into a Beverly Frankenstein?
Their conversations make me laugh though. I wonder how much of a role the producers have in pushing them to react and talk in certain ways, because they get upset over the most absurd things…
Such as when Joyce moved a bit of hair out of Lisa’s face, and Lisa shook her head and said ‘I don’t care, don’t worry about it’. Joyce was VERY offended and confronted her about it later, even reinacting it:
Are they aware of the things going on in the world that would benefit from the amount of attention they give to a strand of hair? I couldn’t survive there.
I’m also fascinated by the editing. If you’re edit-savvy, you’ll recognise the amount of unrelated reaction shots that are edited together. I’ve read papers talking about the manipulation involved in editing reality tv casts into stereotypes.
Nevertheless, you have to acknowledge the skill involved. It’s an art. Combined with the music and sound effects, the edits are comedic regardless of who’s appearing in them. I don’t think editors get enough recognition.
I don’t want to treat these women as plastic people to point at… But are they aware of how they’re being portrayed? Maybe the amount of money I presume they get from the show helps them justify it.
It’s worth a watch. For educational purposes.
Jodie.
I loved this review.
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